Ō"The Meditation Bar & Clarity Cafe"Ķ
by Stephanie Nash
(StephÕs take on a Shinzen Young retreat, Jan 2005)
(Spoken ala Mickey Spillane/MaeWest)
I donÕt know about you, but After a GOOD RETREAT, thereÕs nothing I like better than to head down my local MEDITATION BAR & throwing back a few TECHNIQUES, Émaybe even taking home a good PROCEDURE or two.
ThereÕs a lot of good places around here: the PURIFICATION PUB, HACHMED HATCH, EPOCHE ATTIC, ANNICA ANNEX, & the AXIS OF EGO (which is too noisy for my tastes – and just doesnÕt have a good FEEL to it.)
And thereÕs the CLARIFICATION CAF --
TheyÕve got booths for EATING MEDITATION there.
A mechanical arm comes down & stops your arm as you lift the food.
A voice comes on saying, ŌMeditate on that.Ķ
(They have therapists in the next room for when it doesnÕt work out.)
My favorite place is the VIPASSANA VORTEX – used to be called
ZEN IT IS & was owned by this guy named, ROSHI – but he had a lot of ACTIVITY & moved on to another level of consciousness. I hear he opened a new place with JOHNNY WALKER.
The Vipassana Vortex is situated in a way that you can see right through it.
Over the door is a COLOR MONITOR – running DOS in B&W.
Then something in SANSKRIT or PALI – or maybe itÕs CHINESE.
IÕm told it translates:
CHO greets me at the door. She runs the place. A great dame with a SOLID GOLD heart & a SMILE to match.
She says, ŌIS THAT A GURU IN YOUR POCKET or are you just HAPPY TO BE HERE?Ķ
I smile & head over to the bar for a CLARITY COCKTAIL. I got some FUZZY ASPECTS & could use a good BUZZ.
The BLISS BUNNIES are circulating & FREE FLOATING throughout the room – giving out LABELS. Sometimes they take you upstairs & show you ARISING & FALLING. ThereÕs usually some FLOW there, too.
ThereÕs my friend WILL – whoÕs got a HORSE names CHARLEY.
Yeah, WillÕs a lot like CHARLEY HORSE – but heÕll never see it.
I see SHINZY over at his usual booth. He owns the place. You can tell his booth by the CHARTS & GRAPHS. Yeah, heÕs a GEEK & into ZEN MATHEMATICS, but donÕt let the GLASSES fool you. He may be able to say SAMADHI in a dozen languages, , but he can get your SENSE GATES flowing better than NASAL SPRAY. He reportedly has a bank account with THE BIG GUY with more ZEROÕs than you want to know about.
And Those two DAMES at his side? Activities known as SHIRLEY & NICOLA. But theyÕre no ORDINARY dames. They can become one with you before you even knew you were separate. And they donÕt even have to be here to do it.
Upstairs, thereÕs also a GOENKA Parlour. They do PIERCINGS. They start with the NOSE, and are sometimes known to pierce through the ENTIRE BODY. If youÕre into that kind of thing.
Back when Roshi owned the place, it was a ZEN ARCADE. Lots of parlour games. Learning to clap with one hand & make faces like before you were born. That kind of thing.
There was a BIG FLOWER in the corner – if you could GET INSIDE of it – and get out – without anybody seeing you, youÕd get a ride on the COMPLETE EXPERIENCE – which is no ORDINARY RIDE Supposedly, itÕs the BEST THING that ever happens to you – except you canÕt remember a thing.
The main ZEN thing around here these days is the MERGE-WITH-US Conference Call. ItÕs run by Judith -- that woman who just ran through here wrapped in a TELEPHONE CORD Yeah, I guess you can now merge at LOCAL or LONG-DISTANCE RATES. But INFORMATION is ALWAYS FREE.
That noise is some DECONSTRUCTION happening up on the 3rd Floor. The place is in PIECES, but I hear they got rid of a lot of unnecessary crap that was just gumming up the works. I hear the VIEWÕs a lot better now, too.
ItÕs almost time for the last show. A good act. A singer with a dress so tight – all you can see is EXPANSION & CONTRACTION – with some UNDULATION. Lots of good BODY SENSATIONS
Her name is Melanie Mana & sheÕs a bit self-absorbed, but she sings a good song. Sometimes the show is SOLID, sometimes, RESTFUL but it always FLOWS – and before you know it – itÕs OVER, GONE. KAPUT.
I CHILL with the SOLID, HANG with the RESTFUL, & GO with the FLOW – and when itÕs OVER? – NOTHING. NADA. ZERO. ButÕs thatÕs how it goes.
I go back to the bar for a 2nd Clarity Cocktail before the show.
I wanna get a good seat.
MELANIE MANA (breathy, sexy new age, spaced, silly)
Thank you, thank you very much,
Namaste, Om, Shanti, Shalom, Samadhi, Shamata, Shoonyata, Shingong, Swatata,
You shouldnÕt have.
My goodness, thatÕs a gorgeous dress. Is it nicer than mine?
Oh, enough about you, letÕs talk about me.
IÕd like to close the show with a very special MINDFUL MEDLEY
--and IÕll be channeling my usual SPIRIT GUIDES – the BUDDHA, ELVIS,
and others – you know who you are.
(LUSH LIFE) - Billie
I used to visit all those IMAGE REST PLACES
Those BRIGHT & DARK spaces
Then I would EASE my jaw, legs, arms & IÕd RELAX AWAY
Then TENSIONS of the day
Well, in most casesÉ.
Then, THOUGHTS would ARISE -- & FEELINGS of SIZE
To tempt me to MADNESS.
I thought in my mind, that IÕd never find
QUIET or NEUTRAL
Or that great sense of PEACE
Alas, I was wrong, ÉÉÉ.Again, I was wrong
(GOODIE GOODIE) - Ella
So you learned TECHNIQUES for working with PAIN real well. Goodie, Goodie.
You learn to have NO PREFERENCE for HEAVEN or HELL, Goodie Goodie.
That KLEISHA ŌGUEST DUSTĶ you
SWEEP away – and for CREDIT, too
You BREAK it in little pieces
Now, hooray for you!
So you say NO SELF, NO PROBLEM – ITÕs the MIDDLE WAY, Goodie Goodie.
ThereÕs ONENESS of BLISS & VOID almost every day.
ItÕs not something you UNDERSTAND you
Know itÕs something that you get USED to
Goodie Goodie for you, Goodie Goodie BE FREE
And I hope youÕre SATISFIED, and with EPOCHE.
(SINCE I FELL FOR YOU)
YouÉ..know that DYING is EASY
ItÕs the RESURRECTING – ThatÕs TRICKY
Is the MOUNTAIN DANCING? It DEPENDS.
WHYÉ..am I DOING THIS? I wanna know.
Cause IÕm in a BODY, donÕt you know.
& to SERVE others, says SHINZEN.
ItÕs EXPANSIONÉ.& CONTRACTION
UNDULATION, VIBRATION & FORCE.
Let the Spirit GRAB us,
& PURIFY usÉ
TAKE us BACK to the SOURCE
(where we BELONG, of course.)
IÉ..thought IÕd never see the LIGHT.
But now I MEDITATE every night
JUST KEEP DOING IT. STAY the COURSE.
(BLUE SUEDE SHOES) - Elvis
Well, itÕs ONE for the BODY, TWO for the SHOW,
THREE for the CHATTER – now GO CAT GO,
but donÕt youÉ..Forget in this MARATHON,
You can do anything, but donÕt forget, donÕt forget about GONE.
You can watch it ARISE, you can watch it FLOW
But the FUN begins when it GO GO GOES!!
Now donÕt you, donÕt you forget about GONE
Cause when you follow it through – itÕs a whole new – whole other SONGÉ..
A week in CESSATION, would ease the BITE of it
All I wantÕs to RESIDE inside of itÉ.
GONE – is a PINPOINT – in the SPACE-TIME CONTINUUM
A RETURN to the UNBORN for us to knowÉ.
So that we CAN GO
BACK & FORTHÉ.. you know
And lead BETTER LIVES
FREE from SUFFERING – and GROWÉ.
FULFILLED & at EASE
Cause weÕve all been BLESSED
I SLEEP YET MY HEART WAKETHÉ..OM.
2011 Stephanie Nash – All Rights Reserved